The Journey


The sun is out and it is a beautiful day. Then why can’t I out together a cohesive thought? I have so many ideas running through my head. I try to write them down, but more thoughts creep in.  There is so much going on in the upcoming weeks, I just don’t know where to start. 

I’m so tired of trying to figure things out, can’t they just fall into place for once?  I am so done with everything in life.  Had an anxiety and panic attack while we were out today. Now I’m cranky. Will it ever end?  Everyone wants something from you and you have nothing left to give.  I can’t even afford to pay attention right now. I don’t know how things are going to work out or go the way they need to.

Then there is the indecisiveness of what to eat for dinner. Another choice to make?   Then I make it and no one is home to eat it and now it’s not even what I want. Am I even hungry?  I just want it all to end. The pain, the decisions, the hurt and whatever is thrown my way. 

Needless to say I only got one thing done today that I wanted to. I guess that should be something.  Tomorrow there are things I want to get done, but I am not hopeful about it.  

Well, that is my rant and feelings for now.  I don’t always write when I am feeling up or have the answers.  Supposedly it’s good to write during the dark times. Who knows, maybe, just maybe, tomorrow will be a better day.  Feel free to comment. The tunnel is dark without a glimmer of a light at the end right now. Stay strong, that’s what I try to tell myself.


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